It's official - I'm celibate again.
theMaintenanceMan:: yes, I "employed" a guy a few months ago. He liked me, but wasn't qualified for full-time "theMan" status (personal issues). Wait, let me set the record straight on this phenom. If you're a man, and you're a decent guy, stable, with "potential" (the potential to be the marrying kind), chances are you'll never be the maintenance dude. Most women decide, within 30 seconds of meeting a man, whether he has "potential' or not. This may change later, but yes - it's that initial impression. If you meet her minimum qualities (whatever they are, and it depends on what she's looking for), then you can't be the maintenance man.
So, my maintenance man tends to disappear when I have real life issues. Like when Bessie (my truck) isn't working. I understand the nature of our relationship, so I know he'll turn back up when things blow over. But that doesn't mean that it doesn't bother me. So, when Bessie started running hot last month, and he vamped, I figured it may have been a sign that it was time to chill...
JC:: I get a call, outta the blue. JC's monthly check in, and I'm not expecting anything out of the call, but he surprises me when he asks "so, are you seeing anyone else yet?" I know better than to entertain that question, but it does surprise me when he answers his own question: "I don't have the right to ask you that, so don't answer that. I just wanted you to know, I miss you and I love you. I gotta go." And he hangs up on me.
theMessage:: I was reading ManNMotion's post about celibacy, and it struck a chord. I know what I want, and fooling around with theMaintenanceMan isn't going to get it for me. To get the kind of love I want, the type of intimacy I deserve, there's a walk that has to accompany it, and right now - I'm not walking that path. But, you know I am hard-headed as all get out, so I still don't completely "get" it...
theSign:: I'm talking to EJ about music, and I don't know how we segued into bloggers that saga is secretly lusting after (sssshhhh...I ain't tellin. Suffice it to say that my blog husband wasn't #1 on my list.). Frankly, I think I steered the convo in that direction. Anywhoo, at 12:00 midnight, no sooner do I then type out my top 3, that...
*blip*
my laptop goes black. completely black. No power surge, no outage, no noise. Just black space. AND it won't immediately come back on. Two resets, and some fiddling with my powerchord, and my first words when I log back on with EJ, are:
saga_30311: that's it - it's official. I'm celibate (again)
it's that simple. I want the whole nine, and I refuse to settle. and it's time.
@ princessdom - lmao, girl if only...then I could get a lil $$$ from this...lol.
@coolbabe - thanks, I may have to hit you up for distractions to get me thru the week moments.
@yolie - the house is coming very soon. Thank girl - I 'preciate ya!
@aziza - I feel ya - I just want to keep shouting out the PhDProject, because it was such a cool experience.
Girl you are on a roll. This post should be a self-help book for men AND women! Don't settle folks...Saga said. Believe her.
I just stumbled across your blogg, and i must say i am about 10 years younger than you but black woman you are something.
And a few months ago i decided to go celibate myself... am loving it.
But keep bloggng i enjoyed most of the posts i browsd through.
Thanks to your entry title, I can't get the Thrill is Gone outta my head. Thanks a lot! Don't worry, you'll come out of your dry spell soon enough. In the meantime, I'll hold down the fort for you. That didn't make you feel too good, did it? LMAO
BTW, I love the new Web site's layout and the house is beautiful. I can't wait to get an up-close-and-personal peek inside.
I tripped up on this blog in somebody else's blog comments. I need to add this blog to my blogroll.
Back in 1998, I attended the PhD Project's annual conference in Chicago. I saw the PhD Project's ad in Black Enterprise magazine, and decided to write the essays to determine whether I could hold my own up against the others. But lo and behold, I received an invitation. I found the conference to be very informative and highly enlightening. Representatives from the University of Cincinnati and Michigan State University made me feel like I belonged in their programs, while the rep from the University of Illinois at Urbana Champaign made me feel like I had a snowball's chance in hell. That hurt a little bit. Oh, that's neither here nor there now. At 36, I'm probably too old to take on something like this. Things worked out differently for me, but I still think very highly of the PhD Project.